It's Just A Matter Of Time Before

That American Taliban Kid Johnny Walker Was Indicted Today. Ten Counts Of Terrorism. He Could Get 5 Life Sentences. In Taliban Terms, That's 360 Virgins.

I Don't Know Why It's So Hard To Believe Women. You To Go Saudi Arabia And You Need Two Women To Testify Against A Man. Here You Need 25.

The Republicans Finally Got Some Good News Over The Weekend. The North Koreans Set Off A Nuclear Bomb. Thank God. It Was So Powerful It Knocked The Mark Foley Story Right Off The Front Page. And Knocked Him Off The Page He Was On, Too.

We Live In What's Called An Open Society, Which Of Course Means They Open Our Emails, Open Our Phone Records, And Open Our Medical Records.

Ratings For The Xfl Are So Low That Pretty Soon They'll Be Able To Address The Viewers By Name.