Jimmy Kimmel Still Comes Across Like A

A Fellow With The Inventiveness Of Albert Einstein But With The Attention Span Of Daffy Duck.

Somewhere Around The Turn Of The Century, It Stopped Being Hip To Say You Never Watched Tv. Adults Are Much More Likely To Find Something To Engage Them On Television Than They Are At The Local Multiplex. Edges Are Being Cut On Television All The Time, But At The Movies Only Now And Then.

"more Fun Than A Barrel Of Monkeys." Has Anyone Ever Stopped To Think How Cranky, If Not Downright Vicious, A Barrelful Of Monkeys Would Be, Especially Once Released From The Barrel?

Late-night Television Is Like The Cereal Aisle In The Supermarket: Too Many Choices. Also, Too Many 'different' Brands That Really Aren't Different At All.

Perhaps Western Civilization Is In A Post-decline Phase, Or Maybe The Decline Is Just Taking A Really Long Time, Like The Roman Empire's Did. The Romans Had Gladiators And Christian-hungry Lions And That Sort Of Thing. We Have Mtv.