Keep Moving. It's Hard For Old Age

To Maintain Success, Stamina Is More Important Than Talent. You Have To Learn To Be A Marathon Runner.

Never Buy A Fur From A Vegetarian.

I Love Israel For Its Blue And White Flag As It Matches My Legs.

I'm Going Out With These Old Guys. One Guy Gave Me A Hickey And Left His Teeth In My Neck. Another Man, We Were Having A Perfectly Lovely Dinner; He Looked Up And Me And Went: You're Not My Wife! Another Guy Died During Dinner. I Had To Go In His Pocket To Get The American Express Card. Then You Wonder: What Would He Tip? Another Guy Said: I Want You To Meet My Family, And Took Me To The Cemetery.

Elizabeth Taylor's So Fat She Puts Mayonnaise On Aspirin.