Last Halloween I Ran Out Of Candy

Newt Gingrich Wants To Repeal Child Labor Laws. Ladies And Gentlemen, This Is The Man That We Need To Lead Us Into The 18th Century.

Mitt Romney Is Doing What He Can. He's Trying Very Hard. He Wants To Unite America, The Rich With The Wealthy, The Poor With The Indigent, And The White With The Caucasian.

If Ricky Schroder And Gary Coleman Had A Fight On Television With Pool Cues, Who Would Win? 1) Ricky Schroder 2) Gary Coleman 3) The Television Viewing Public

It Turns Out That President Obama Has Acid Reflux. He Had A Sore Throat, Went To The Hospital, And They Diagnosed It As Acid Reflux. Talk About Irony -- It's Not Covered By Obamacare.

Mayor De Blasio Wants To Eliminate Garbage. He Believes New York City Produces Way Too Much Garbage. Well, Heck, Forget About Producing Too Much Garbage. What About Late-night Talk Shows?