My Acting Technique Is To Look Up

What's The Difference Between Sex And Love? I Have Four Wives And Five Kids. I Apparently Don't Know The Difference.

One Night I Went Over To Get Some Dope From Some Hollywood Tough Guy. After I Left, My Son Scott, Who Was Only Fifteen, Went Over With A Baseball Bat To Kill Him. I Was Laughing Out Of One Eye And Crying Out Of The Other. I Thought, Who Am I Kidding?

The Most Talented People Are Always The Nicest.

People Are Always Backing Up When I'm Just Going To Shake Their Hands.

My Least Favorite Phrase In The English Language Is 'i Don't Care.'