My Biggest Regret In Life Is That

The Best Pitch I Ever Heard About Cocaine Was Back In The Early Eighties When A Street Dealer Followed Me Down The Sidewalk Going: I Got Some Great Blow Man. I Got The Stuff That Killed Belushi.

I'm Still Pretty Self-centered, Greedy And Angry.

If I'm President, There Are Going To Be Government Vans That Drive Around And Pick Up People Who Shouldn't Be Wearing Certain Clothing. Talk About Lack Of Civil Rights - I'm Sorry, I'm Pulling You Right Off The Street, And We're Giving You Clothes That You're Going To Be O.k. In.

Peter Falk And Denis Leary Today Walked Into A Starbucks And Shot 27 People, Without Any Announcement Whatsoever.

"yeah, Well, If You Eat Red Meat, It Stays In Your Colon For Fifteen Years!" Good! I Paid For It; I Want It In My Ass, Okay? I Want Them To Find A Meat Sweater From My Esophagus To My Asshole When They Open Me Up In The End! "this Guy's Covered In Meat! He's Meat-man! He's Meat-tracheotomy-man!"