My Eyebrows Could Do With A Trim.

Acting In A Stage Play Is Like Working The Evening Shift In An Office.

Listening To Chris Moyles On Radio 1 Is The Most Miserable Thing Any Human Being Can Do, But Attending Awards Ceremonies Isn't Far Behind.

I See My Large Nose, Like Half An Avocado. I Broke It Falling Downstairs When I Was Six, And It Now Resembles A Large Blob Of Play-dough.

An Uninspiring Canvas Becomes A Glamorous Masterpiece When It Is Reattributed To A Better-known Artist.

Obviously I Am Not Bothered About Men's Fashion - Is Anyone, Apart From Jonathan Ross?