My Sexuality Is A Part Of Me

I Justified It In So Many Ways. I Had A Very, Very Long And Difficult Struggle With My Sexuality.

Shame Weighs A Lot More Than Flesh And Bone.

My Feelings For Ellen Overrode All Of My Fear About Being Out As A Lesbian. I Had To Be With Her, And I Just Figured I'd Deal With The Other Stuff Later.

I Would Eat 300 Calories A Day - A Lot Of Jell-o And No-sugar Everything, Of Course. I Was Doing Pilates, Weight-training, Circuit Training; Over Lunch I Would Run On A Treadmill In My Dressing Room With A Fan On My Face So I Wouldn't Sweat My Makeup Off.

When It’s Quiet In My Head Like This, That’s When The Voice Doesn’t Need To Tell Me How Pathetic I Am. I Know It In The Deepest Part Of Me. When It’s Quiet Like This, That’s When I Truly Hate Myself.