No One Will Ever Ask Me To

I Learned In My Early Years In The Theater That I Would Never Become The Guy On Top. I'll Never Create A Show; I Don't Have A Brain Expansive Enough To See The Whole Picture, In A Way That Would Behoove Anyone.

I Don't Know What It Is On An Elemental Level, But A Beard In General Evokes Hedonism. It's A More Lush Personal Grooming Style. It's More Comfortable And Cozy; It's Less Sharp And Angular And Businesslike. I Feel Like A Beard Is More Hobbit-like, Even Though Hobbits Themselves Are Clean-shaven.

I Awaken. I Consume Oxygen, Then Bacon, Eggs And Black Coffee, Then My Wife, Then Bacon.

I Come From The Theater, Where I Got Into Acting Because I Love Transforming. I Love Nothing More Than To Be Unrecognizable.

I Think The Whole Thing Is Kind Of Sad, Honestly, In The Same Way That Our Civilization - Particularly The Consumers Of Pop Culture - Has Grown So Used To An Emasculated, Bare-chested Leading Man That Something Like Simply Growing A Mustache Can Impress People.