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Good News. President Bush Is Creating Thousands Of New Jobs. Unfortunately, All Of Them Are At The White House.

Give A Man A Fish And He Will Eat For A Day. Teach A Man To Fish And He Will Eat For A Lifetime. Teach A Man To Create An Artificial Shortage Of Fish And He Will Eat Steak.

A New Poll Shows Only 3 Percent Strongly Approve Of The Job Congress Is Doing, With A Margin Of Error Of 4 Percent, So It's Possible That "less Than No One" Thinks They're Doing A Good Job.

A New Study Finds That Women Use Their Whole Brain When Listening And Men Only Use Half Of Their Brain. You See, Men Use The Other Half Of Their Brain To Come Up With Excuses. I Don't Think Women Use Their Whole Brain When Listening. I Think They Use Half Of It And The Other Half Is Used To Memorize What Men Are Saying So They Can Use It Against Them 10 Years Later!

Statistics Show 50% Of The People Use The Internet. The Rest Have Sex With Real People.