Now, Let's See How You Fare Against

Life Is Cruel. Why Should The Afterlife Be Any Different? I Offer You A Choice. Join My Crew...and Postpone The Judgment. One Hundred Years Before The Mast. Will Ye Serve?

I Wanted To Be A Jockey.

Now, Let's See How You Fare Against The Flying Dutchman And Her Vile Captain, Davy Jones!

You Know I Used To Be A Heartthrob, And Now I'm A Coronary.

Over The Last Couple Of Years I Have Gotten An Average Of 2,000 Letters A Week From Fans.