Off-camera, I Sound Like Perry Como.

Nothing Can Help My Comedy.

I Found Out About Jonathan Winters Death A Day After It Happened. That Seems Wrong. A Talent Like His Should Be More Revered. The World Knew About Kim Kardashians Divorce Before She Did.

Back When Jerry Seinfeld Was Just Another Comedian Hanging Around The Clubs, I'd Imitate Him To Amuse Myself And The Other Comics. The Club Owners Would Say, 'what Are You Doing That For? Nobody Knows Him.'

Japan Is Really Advanced. They Don't Go To The Beach. The Beach Comes To Them.

There Are Times When I've Had Ideas Walking Down The Street That I Thought Were Great, And The Minute I Got Onstage, I Would Think Of Them And Go, 'wow, That Would Never Work,' Even Before I Did It In Front Of The Audience.