Pebble Beach Is Alcatraz With Grass.

Dying Is To Be Avoided Because It Can Ruin Your Whole Career.

I Don't Know If The Presidential Candidates Are Running For The White House Or Animal House.

Golf's Really Fun In Japan Because Of The Women Caddies. ... I Saw One Guy Start Out Playing Alone With His Caddie. By The 9th Hole They Were Engaged And When They Finished On 18 They Had A Foursome.

If I Have To Lay An Egg For My Country, I'll Do It.

I Have This Terrific Make-up Man. But He's Expensive. I Have To Bring Him In From Lourdes.