Quiet Down, We Don't Want To Wake

Fine Art And Pizza Delivery: What We Do Falls Neatly In Between.

You Know, We Had The Elections Earlier In The Week, And A Dead Woman, In Pennsylvania, Somehow Was On The Ballot And She Was Elected To City Council. A Dead Woman Actually Elected! And I'm Thinking, Well, I Guess There Is Still Hope For Al Gore.

People Say New Yorkers Can't Get Along. Not True. I Saw Two New Yorkers, Complete Strangers, Sharing A Cab. One Guy Took The Tires And The Radio; The Other Guy Took The Engine.

Ladies And Gentlemen, After What I've Been Through, I Am Happy Just To Be Wearing Clothes That Open In The Front.

You Folks Been Following The Big British Petroleum Oil Spill In The Gulf Of Mexico? I'm Telling You, British Petroleum Has Put More Birds In Oil Than Colonel Sanders.