Telephone, N. An Invention Of The Devil

Nonsense, N. The Objections That Are Urged Against This Excellent Dictionary.

When Lost In A Forest Go Always Down Hill. When Lost In A Philosophy Or Doctrine Go Upward.

Don't Steal; Thou'lt Never Thus Compete Successfully In Business. Cheat.

Force, N. "force Is But Might," The Teacher Said P/ "that Definition's Just."/ The Boy Said Naught But Throught Instead,/ Remembering His Pounded Head:/ "force Is Not Might But Must!"

Brain, N. An Apparatus With Which We Think That We Think. That Which Distinguishes The Man Who Is Content To Be Something From The Man Who Wishes To Do Something. A Man Of Great Wealth, Or One Who Has Been Pitchforked Into High Station, Has Commonly Such A Headful Of Brain That His Neighbors Cannot Keep Their Hats On. In Our Civilization, And Under Our Republican Form Of Government, Brain Is So Highly Honored That It Is Rewarded By Exemption From The Cares Of Office.