The Circus Doesn't Stop. A Federal Appeals

According To A British Poll, You've Only Got A One In Five Chance Of Achieving Your Childhood Career Ambition. Which Probably Explains Why You Don't Run Into That Many Cowboys, Princesses, Or Space Rangers.

Actually, You Know Who Gave The Shortest Inauguration Speech In History? George Washington. It Was Only Like Three Minutes Long. Well, Sure. George Washington Couldn't Tell A Lie.

Tonight Was The Cnn Primary Debate With The Four Remaining Candidates. It Was Kind Of A Change For Newt Gingrich. Usually When He's Arguing With Three People At Once, It's His Wife, His Ex-wife, And His Mistress.

John Kerry Said Today That He Wants To Get Rid Of Tax Cuts For The Rich And His Wife Said, 'hey, Shut Up! What's The Matter With You?! Are You Nuts?!'

For Some Reason, The Secret Service Revealed This, That Sarah Palin's Secret Service Code Name Is 'denali.' Turns Out 'denali' Is An Old Eskimo Name That Means 'dan Quayle.'