The Economy Is So Bad That Bedbugs

According To A British Poll, You've Only Got A One In Five Chance Of Achieving Your Childhood Career Ambition. Which Probably Explains Why You Don't Run Into That Many Cowboys, Princesses, Or Space Rangers.

Cnn Found That Hillary Clinton Is The Most Admired Woman In America. Women Admire Her Because She's Strong And Successful. Men Admire Her Because She Allows Her Husband To Cheat And Get Away With It.

I Wanted To Have A Career In Sports When I Was Young, But I Had To Give Up The Idea. I'm Only Six Feet Tall, So I Couldn't Play Basketball. I'm Only 190 Pounds, So I Couldn't Play Football, And I Have 20/20 Vision, So I Couldn't Be A Referee.

John Kerry Keeping A Low Profile This Week. He Said He Wanted To Get Away And Go Someplace Where No One Would Expect To See Him. So I Guess He Showed Up At His Old Seat In The Senate. Nobody's Going To Look For Him There.

The White House Has Now Released Military Documents That They Say Prove George Bush Met His Requirements For The National Guard. Big Deal, We've Got Documents That Prove Al Gore Won The Election.