The Only Way For Mankind To Survive

Death Is Nature's Way Of Killing You.

The Difference Between The Three Abrahamic Religions: Christianity - Mumbling To The Ceiling, Judaism - Mumbling To The Wall, Islam - Mumbling To The Floor.

Edward Snowden Gave A Little Press Conference Today. He Is Apparently Seeking Temporary Asylum In Russia. Because, You Know, When You're Tired Of The Government Snooping Into Everything You Do, Putin's Russia Is Definitely The Place You Want To Go.

Disneyland's A Mess. And It's Not Just The Measles. Donald Duck Has Bird Flu. Pocahontas Has Small Pox. The Little Mermaid Has Crabs. And The Monorail? Mono.

Can We Go Back To Using Facebook For What It Was Originally For - Looking Up Exes To See How Fat They Got?