The Secret Of Writing Comedy Is To

To Reduce Stress, Avoid Excitement. Spend More Time With Your Spouse.

As Much As We Admire All The Characteristics Of A Ronald Reagan, As Soon As Something Goes Wrong, People Will Hate Those Same Characteristics.

There's So Much Pollution In The Air Now That If It Weren't For Our Lungs There'd Be No Place To Put It All.

Successful Salesman: Someone Who Has Found A Cure For The Common Cold Shoulder.

In Prehistoric Times, Mankind Often Had Only Two Choices In Crisis Situations: Fight Or Flee. In Modern Times, Humor Offers Us A Third Alternative; Fight, Flee - Or Laugh.