This Is What I've Been Waiting For

I've Got Stuff About Airline Mergers, Which Just Shows That My Stand-up Is Getting More Insane By The Minute.

The Thing That Makes My Generation The Greatest Is Our Ability To Hang Out. We're Spectacular At It. If You Take Somebody From My Generation And Sit Them On A Couch And Bring Them Food And Plumbing, They'll Sit There And Talk To You About Anything You Want Until The Day You Die.

Who Knew That The Devil Had A Factory Where He Made Millions Of Fossils, Which His Minions Distributed Throughout The Earth, In Order To Confuse My Tiny Brain?

One Of The Most Important Things, Especially When You're Leaving School, Is To Realize You're Going To Be Dealing With A Lot Of Idiots. And A Lot Of Those Idiots Are In Charge Of Things, So If You're In An Interview And You Really Want To Tell The Person Off, Don't Do It.

I've Always Been A Social Network Retard, Even Before There Was A Social Network. People Would Say, "you Want To Go To This Party And Do Some Networking?"