This Morning My Dad Called Me Up

We Have First Lady Michelle Obama On The Show Tonight. As You'd Expect, Security's Been Pretty Tight. On My Way In I Got Five Pat-downs, And That Was Just From Joe Biden.

Jeb Bush Is Facing Criticism After It Was Just Revealed That He Checked Off His Race As 'hispanic' On A Voter Registration Form Back In 2009. When Asked If He Regrets It Now, Bush Said, 'si.'

Republican Candidate George Pataki Said His Dogs Would Give Him The Best Endorsement For Becoming Our Next President. Until They Hear Chris Christie Always Carries Bacon In His Pockets. (joke's On Them, Though, He's Never Going To Give Them Any Of That Pocket Bacon. It's What Gets Him Through Long Meetings!)

Officials At The London Olympics Will Be Conducting 5,000 Tests For Steroids. Or As Lance Armstrong Calls That, 'a Monday.'

You're Sitting There, With Your Wife And Your Baby And Your Smiling Dog, And You're Watching Real Housewives Getting Into Fistfights On Tv. And You Go, 'how Great Is My Life? I'm So Happy Right Now.'