Whatever You Do, You're Going To Be

Happiness Is Sitting Down To Watch Some Slides Of Your Neighbor's Vacation And Finding Out That He Spent Two Weeks In A Nudist Colony.

There's Only One Critic Whose Opinion I Really Value, In The Final Analysis: Johnny Carson. I Have Never Needed Any Entourage Standing Around Bolstering My Ego. I'm Secure. I Know Exactly Who And What I Am. I Don't Need To Be Told. I Make No Apologies For Being The Way I Am.

I Can Empathize With President [george Bush]. I Know What It Feels Like Having A Young Guy Waiting Around For You To Keel Over.

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Happiness Is Being Stuck In An Elevator And Discovering The Ravishing Blonde With You Is A Liquor Salesman With A Case Of Samples.