When Jack Benny Plays The Violin, It

After Quitting Radio I Was Able To Live On The Money I Saved On Aspirins.

An Associate Producer Is The Only Guy In Hollywood Who Will Associate With A Producer.

An Actor's Popularity Is Fleeting. His Success Has The Life Expectancy Of A Small Boy Who Is About To Look Into A Gas Tank With A Lighted Match.

With The Advance Of Refrigeration, I Hope That Along With The Frozen Foods Someday We Will Have Frozen Conversation. A Person Will Be Able To Keep A Frozen Promise Indefinitely.

Washington Is No Place For A Good Actor. The Competition From Bad Actors Is Too Great.