When Turkeys Mate They Think Of Swans.

I Owe One Thing To My Public - The Best Performance I Can Give.

The Closest Thing To Roseanne Barr's Singing The National Anthem Was My Cat Being Neutered.

New York Is An Exciting Town Where Something Is Happening All The Time, Most Unsolved.

I'm An Entertainer; I Try To Give The Public What It Wants While I'm On The Screen, And I'm Completely Sincere About It. If I Don't Happen To Be A Laughing Boy Off The Screen, That Doesn't Make Me A Hypocrite Or A Phony.

Nbc's A Little Jealous Of Cnn Correspondent Wolf Blitzer. They Want To Get A Reporter With A Macho-sounding Name Too, So They're Changing Irving R. Levine's Name To Scud Shrapnel.