Whether It's A Potato Or A Nut,

They Keep Saying That Sea Levels Are Rising An' All This. It's Nowt To Do With The Icebergs Melting, It's Because There's Too Many Fish In It. Get Rid Of Some Of The Fish And The Water Will Drop. Simple. Basic Science.

Being Honest With You, It's Not The 'great' Wall Of China. It's An All Right Wall. It's The 'all Right Wall Of China.'

There Is Someone For Everyone, I'nt There. That's Always My Thing. And It's Reassuring I Think.

When You've Been On A Programme Called 'an Idiot Abroad' Job Offers Aren't Exactly Flying In.

Knowledge Is Almost Annoying.