Why Are Our Days Numbered And Not,

I Don't Think My Parents Liked Me. They Put A Live Teddy Bear In My Crib.

If The [actors] Are Working, And I Have A Dinner Engagement, I Don't Do 20 Takes. I Do Five Takes And Go Home. I Want To Go To Dinner.

Life Is Tough And It's Tough Whether You're Famous Or Not Famous. And In The End It's Probably Better To Be Famous Because The Perks Are Better. You Get Better Seats At The Basketball Game, And You Get Better Tables And Reservations Places. If I Call A Doctor On Saturday Morning I Can Get Him. There's A Lot Of Things, Indulgences That You Don't Get, If You're Not Famous. Now I'm Not Saying It's Fair. But I Can't Say That I Don't Enjoy It.

Bisexuality Immediately Doubles Your Chances For A Date On Saturday Night.

Death Is An Acquired Trait.