Why Did Mitt Romney Strap His Dog

The President Said That Gold Told Him To Invade Iraq. You See That's What Happens When You Mix New Testament And Old Milwaukee.

Guns Aren't Just A Tool Of Last Resort. They're Awesome. That's Why People Stroke Them. And Name Them, And Take Pictures With Them. You Guys Aren't Just Firearm Enthusiasts — You're Ammosexuals. And Before You Try And Deny You Have Some Sort Of Unnatural Romantic Relationship With Your Gun, Consider This. You're Taking It Out To Dinner! Because It Completes You. Get A Room.

Little Do Women Know What Big Ideas I Have In My Pants.

If Conservatives Don't Want To Be Seen As Bitter People Who Cling To Their Guns And Religion And Anti-immigrant Sentiments, They Should Stop Being Bitter And Clinging To Their Guns, Religion And Anti-immigrant Sentiments.

Faith Means Making A Virtue Out Of Not Thinking. It's Nothing To Brag About...religion Is Dangerous Because It Allows Human Beings, Who Don't Have All The Answers, To Think That They Do.