Would A Real Man Get Caught Eating

I've Done A Lot Of Complaining Here, But Of All The Things I've Complained About, I Can't Complain About My Life.

I Never Get Over Feeling Bad About Tearing Open A Beautifully Wrapped Present. It Takes Ten Seconds To Destroy A Work Of Art That Took Someone Ten Minutes To Accomplish.

I Dislike Loud-mouthed Patriots Who Suggest They Like Our Country More Than I Do. Some People's Idea Of Patriotism Is Hating Other Countries.

Almost All Of Us Have An Elevator Or Two In Our Lives Somewhere. We Wait For Them, We Ride On Them. We're Annoyed By The Wait But Pleased With The Lift.

You're Better Off Missing A Bus Or An Airplane Once In A While Than You Are Getting There Too Early All The Time.