You Can't Ask The Women To Do

I Tell My Boys Not To Play Rough With Their Younger Sister. I Try To Teach Them What I Know Already: You're Never Going To Win An Argument With A Girl, So Just Let Her Have What She Wants!

But Even In My Darkest Days I Had Faith It Would Turn Around.

You've Got To Quit Lowering Your Standards. Set Your Requirements Up Front So When A Guy Hooks You, He Has To Know This Is Business.

I Can't Cuss And Tell Jokes The Rest Of My Life. I Gotta Say Something Meaningful. I Gotta Give Something Back To A Creator Who Has Given So Much To Me.

You Have Nothing If You're Texting A Guy In A Relationship. We Can Text Six Women A Minute. We Can Text It And Push 'reply All.' I Mean, Since We're Lying, We Might As Well Lie To Everybody.