You Can Write A Great Country Record

No, I Want Big Ol' Titties In My Face!

See, The Black Man Gotta Fly To Get To Something The White Man Can Walk To.

A Comedy Club Is A Place Where You Work Out Material, You're Trying Material.

Nobody's Good. I Hate It. I Truly Hate It. I Mean, There's A Lot Of Guys Doing Stuff I Admire, But Stand-up-wise I Feel Very Alone. I Really Miss Bill Hicks. I Wish I Could Have Put Him On My Show. And I Really Miss Sam Kinison A Lot. Richard Pryor's Sick... It's Like You Get Here And Then, Oh Wait A Minute, There's Nobody Here Any More. I Feel Like The Guy Who Finally Got Into Studio 54, Three Years Too Late, Duh, Where Are All The Famous People?

You'd Got A Baseball Game, Or A Football Game, Basketball Game, "usa! Usa! Usa!" Hey, Calm Down! Got A Little German On It, Don't You Think?