You Exaggerate Your Own Reactions.

I Have Tried... Believe Me, I Have Tried To Like Rap Music. It Makes Me Feel So Very, Very Old. I Have Tried To Get Home With The Downies.

I Write All The Time, But You Just Want To Be Careful What You Put Out. That's All. You Want To Have The Confidence That You've Done What You Need To Do To It, Because Otherwise It's An Exercise In Vanity.

Money Can't Buy You Love, But It Can Get You Some Really Good Chocolate Ginger Biscuits.

What I Prefer Is An Audience Who Listen. And Are Intelligent. Which I Try And Assume Every Audience Is. And That If Something Goes Wrong, It's Generally My Fault And Not Theirs.

I Don't Mind Most Religious People, I Talk To Them. I Listen To Them, You Know, Banging On. "i Prayed Very Hard And Then The Fairy Came." "did He? Good. Have A Biscuit." I Only Get Annoyed When They Try And Make Me See The Fairy. "you Have To Let The Fairy Into Your Heart." Look, I Wouldn't Let Him Into My Garden, Okay? I'd Shoot Him On Sight, If He Existed, Which He Doesn't. Now Have Another Biccie And Be Quiet, Will You Please?