You Might Be A Redneck If You

I Have Never Been Jealous. Not Even When My Dad Finished Fifth Grade A Year Before I Did.

I've Gotten To The Point I Won't Even Watch The 11 O'clock News. You Just Walk Away From It Thinking How Bad Everything Is.

You Might Be A Redneck If Your Birth Announcement Included The Word Rug Rat.

If The Veins In The Back Of Your Legs Look Like The Street Map Of Greater Pittsburgh, You Ain't Nobody's Babydoll.

You Might Be A Redneck If Your Wife Keeps A Can Of Vienna Sausage In Her Purse.