As An American Citizen, I'm Not Asking

Which Of The Following Two Groups Contains The Most Former Grand Dragons Of The Ku Klux Klan - The First 59 Tea Party People You Run Into This Morning, Or The U.s. Senate Democratic Caucus?

You Know, Back In The 1950s And '60s, When J. Edgar Hoover Was Making The Fbi The Respected Organization It Used To Be, Oftentimes They Would Find A Fugitive And Basically Have His House Surrounded, And Then Put Out A Press Release Saying He Was On The Top 10 Most Wanted List. And 10 Minutes Later, He'd Be Arrested.

Nobody Has Ever Denied That When It Comes To His Trade - Gigolo - John Forbes Kerry Is One Of The All-time Greats. He's In The Gigolo Hall Of Fame. See, A Really Good Gigolo Might Snag One Heiress In A Lifetime With A Nine-figure Trust Fund. Kerry Has Married Two. When It Comes To Gigolos, He's Steve Jobs.

I Used To Think Cape Wind Was A Great Idea. That Was When Ted Kennedy Was Alive And Railing About How He Might Spill His Chivas If He Had To Keep Maneuvering The Mya Around All Those Noisy Seagull-murdering Wind Turbines. Anything Ted Kennedy Was Against, I Was For.

Barack Obama Is Like The Old Joke About Boats. The Two Best Days Of Owning A Boat Are The Day You Buy It And The Day You Sell It.