Failure At A Task May Be The

If It Was Raining Soup, The Irish Would Go Out With Forks.

I Have A Total Irreverence For Anything Connected With Society Except That Which Makes The Roads Safer, The Beer Stronger, The Food Cheaper And The Old Men And Old Women Warmer In The Winter And Happier In The Summer.

Critics Are Like Eunuchs In A Harem; They Know How It's Done, They've Seen It Done Every Day, But They're Unable To Do It Themselves.

Scream At God If That's The Only Thing That Will Get Results.

There Is No Human Situation So Miserable That It Cannot Be Made Worse By The Presence Of A Policeman.