Firefighters Don't Go On Strike.

Jerry Lewis Has Been Married Twenty Times. He Gets Married On A Tuesday, They Find His Wife Dead In A Swimming Pool On Thursday. Maybe If You Married Someone Who's Old Enough To Swim Next Time, Ok Jerry?

Worrying About Tomorrow Is The Best Way To Screw Up Today.

Happy Easter Everyone! Jesus Dies, Comes Back From The Dead - And We Get Chocolate Eggs. It's Like Turn-down Service From God.

If You See Me Doing A New Stand-up Special, It Probably Means I've Been Out Of Work For A While.

Kathy Bates Is Sexy. It's Partly Because Of Her Talent, But She's Got A Great Face, And A Great Laugh.