George Burns Has Been On My Show

Never Marry A Girl Named 'marie' Who Used To Be Known As 'murray'.

There Was This Billy Goat At A Movie Studio Who Found And Ate A Can Of Film. When A Nanny Asked Him How He Liked It, He Said, "it Was All Right But I Liked The Book Better."

Only Lie About The Future.

When A Comic Becomes Enamored With His Own Views And Foists Them Off On The Public In A Polemic Way, He Loses Not Only His Sense Of Humor But His Value As A Humorist.

May You Have The Income Of A Republican And The Sex Life Of A Democrat!