Gossip Is Vice Enjoyed Vicariously

The Wise Way To Benefit Humanity Is To Attend To Your Own Affairs, And Thus Give Other People An Opportunity To Look After Theirs.

Men Who Marry For Gratification, Propagation Or The Matter Of Buttons Or Socks, Must Expect To Cope With And Deal In A Certain Amount Of Quibble, Subterfuge, Concealments, And Double, Deep-dyed Prevarication.

I Will Gladly Lecture For Fifty Dollars, But I'll Not Be A Guest For Less Than A Hundred.

The New Definition Of A Heathen Is A Man Who Has Never Played Baseball.

Every Man Is A Damn Fool For At Least Five Minutes Every Day; Wisdom Consists In Not Exceeding The Limit.