He Found A New Way To Cover

Dad Told Me To Stop Running In Circles, I Couldn't, So He Nailed Down My Other Foot!

My Son's An Idiot. He Sprained His Ankle Playing Golf. He Fell Off The Ballwasher.

Boy Is My Wife Stupid. It Takes Her And Hour And A Half To Watch 60 Minutes. My Daughters No Bargain Either. In Public School She Was Voted Most Likely To Conceive.

I Remember I Was So Depressed I Was Going To Jump Out A Window On The Tenth Floor; They Sent A Priest Up To Talk To Me And He Said, ' On Your Mark...'

My Mom Took Me To A Dog Show And I Won!!