He Taught Me Never To Smile, Which

I've Always Suffered From A Complete Inability To Sense Who's Important.

The Scots Are A Very Tough People. They Have Drive-by Headbuttings. In Glasgow A Sweatband Is Considered A Silencer.

My Mother Was Like A Sister To Me, Only We Didn't Have Sex Quite So Often.

When I Was 10, I Beat Up The School Bully. His Arms Were In Casts. That's What Gave Me The Courage.

I'm Not Catholic, But I Gave Up Picking My Belly Button For Lint.