I'm Not Catholic, But I Gave Up

One Man's Pet-stained Carpet Is Another Man's Twister Game.

I Used To Think I Knew Everything, But Older You Get The More You See Other Areas. If You Could Read Everything About Both Sides, You'll Pretty Much Be In The Middle Again, Which Is The State You Had When You Were Totally Ignorant. So My Theory Is If You Maintain Total Ignorance - Which Isn't Easy, But I Try - You'll Be Just As Far Ahead As If You'd Spent Days And Days Reading About The Whole Issue. And You Have That Much Extra Time To Play Pac-man.

The Scots Are A Very Tough People. They Have Drive-by Headbuttings. In Glasgow A Sweatband Is Considered A Silencer.

I Tried Body Surfing Once, But How Often Do You Find A Corpse?

Not Everybody Hates Me. Only The People Who've Met Me.