Hell, If I'd Jumped On All The

Disagreeing With The Fervent Patriotism Of The Confederates: "i Think It's Hard Winning A War With Words, Gentlemen. . . . I'm Saying Very Plainly That The Yankees Are Better Equipped Than We. . . . All We've Got Is Cotton And Slaves, And Arrogance." "i Seem To Be Spoiling Everybody's Brandy And Cigars And Dreams Of Victory."

It Is An Extra Dividend When You Like The Girl You've Fallen In Love With.

When The Public Doesn't Want Me Any Longer, I'll Quit.

I Don't Want A Lot Of Strangers Looking Down At My Wrinkles And My Big Fat Belly When I'm Dead.

I'm Just A Lucky Slob From Ohio Who Happened To Be In The Right Place At The Right Time.