I Am One Of The Lucky People

I Know A Guy Who Gave Up Smoking Cigarettes, Consuming, Sex, And Wealthy Meals.

I'm Often Asked, "what Is Your Favorite Moment During The 30 Years You Hosted [the Tonight Show]?" I Really Don't Have Just One. The Times I Enjoyed The Most Were The Spontaneous, Unplanned Segments That Just Happened, Like Ed Ames' Infamous "tomahawk Toss" That Produced One Of The Longest Laughs In Television History. When These Lucky Moments Happen, You Just Go With Them And Enjoy The Experience And High Of The Moment.

The Difference Between Divorce And Legal Separation Is That Legal Separation Gives A Husband Time To Hide His Money.

As Long As I Don't Commit Any Crimes, You Have No Right To Judge Me Except By My Performance As A Professional. On That Level, You're Welcome To Think Whatever You Want About Me.

I Heard From My Cat's Lawyer Today; My Cat Wants $12,000 A Week For Tender Vittles.