I Can Never Do Nothing In This

I'm Not Afraid To Take On Somebody Or Say Something That Somebody Will Find Offensive Because Unfortunately In Comedy, You Can't Say Anything Really Good Without Offending Somebody.

80% Of The Women Who Were Asked If They Fake Orgasms Said Yes. Actually, They Said Yes! Oh God, Yes!

You're Never Going To Be A Yankee For A Day, Or You're Never Going To Be A Laker, But With Pro-ams, They Allow You To Feel Like You're A Professional Golfer And Play Under Their Conditions.

I Want To Tell You About A Woman I Have Been Married To For Ten Years, My Wife, Ann, Who Speaking Truthfully, Saved Me From Myself. Who Saved Me From Destroying Myself Because Of My Background. Who Saved Me From Wasting My Life, Drinking My Life Away, Never Fulfilling My Dreams Because Of What I Had Come From, And Truly Believing And Loving - Truly The First Person To Ever Truthfully, Unconditionally Love Me.

Max: What's A Period? George: It's A Bullet We Dodge, Go Get Ready.