I Didn't Hang Any Pictures In My

If You Have A Secret, People Will Sit A Little Bit Closer.

My Job Was Basically To Look At A Good Friend Completely Naked And Rub Lotion On Her Back. I Was Naked Too, But I Got To Put A Towel On Almost Immediately. So I Was Like, "well, This Is Going To Be Embarrassing, But It's Also Going To Be Kinda Awesome."

I've Got Like A Week And A Half Left, All Bets Are Off.

Ethanol Is, In Its Pure Form, Just As Much Of A Sham As Oil.

I Touched An Oscar Once. Friend Of Mine Has One, For Writing. As Soon As I Touched It, He Said, Now You'll Never Win One.