I Get Recognized, But I'm Not Really

I Smoke So Much. Three Packs A Day... I Went To The Bathroom, A Camel Came Out Of My Ass.

Sometimes You Need A Cigarette. Like After You Have Sex With A Beautiful Woman Or A Confused Young Man.

I Don't Watch Reality Tv.

If You Take Off Your Pants And Her First Reaction Is, "awwww, Look At It...like A Little Baby Jesus." Time To Buy A Porsche.

It's A Horrible Economy But I'm Trying To Do My Part. I Just Bought A New Shower Curtain It Has All The Presidents On It. Do You Know How Hard It Is To Masturbate With All The Presidents Staring At You? And When The Water Hits Them It Looks Like They're Crying.