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New York Was The Glamorous Town That You Only See Now In Old Movies And On Broadway Stages. The Sky Was Lit Up With Dancing Neon Signs. It Was Safe To Walk Out In The Streets.

The Buffalo Isn't As Dangerous As Everyone Makes Him Out To Be. Statistics Prove That In The United States More Americans Are Killed In Automobile Accidents Than Are Killed By Buffalo.

The Best Way To Clean Up A Son's Room Is To Close The Door And Pretend It's Not Part Of The House.

This Is A Wonderful Way To Celebrate An 80th Birthday... I Wanted To Be 65 Again, But They Wouldn't Let Me - Homeland Security.

A Bad Liver Is To A Frenchman What A Nervous Breakdown Is To An American. Everyone Has Had One And Everyone Wants To Talk About It.