I Know The Guru Route, I Know

I'm Not A Role Model To My Kids. They're A Role Model To Me.

You Can Be Fat And Love Yourself. You Can Be Fat And Have A Great Damn Personality. You Can Be Fat And Sew Your Own Clothes. But You Can't Be Fat And Healthy.

There's A Couple Of Universal Principles In Life. One Is, Don't Ever Open A Restaurant. One Out Of Every Two Fails.

If You Want A Higher Power, Go To The Goddamn Sun. Just Go To The Sun - And Stop Destroying The Ozone Layer.

I Know The Guru Route, I Know You Go Sit On A Mountain. But Screw India. I Ain't Going There.