I Like To Serve Chocolate Cake, Because

Remember There Is No Way You Can Give The Father Custody Of The Children Without Getting A Divorce.

I Finally Had A Ship Tattooed To My Chest. I Wanted Something On It.

I'd Love To Slit My Mother-in-law's Corsets And Watch Her Spread To Death.

The Only Time I Ever Enjoyed Ironing Was The Day I Accidentally Got Gin In The Steam Iron.

Just The Other Day I Said To Fang, "don't You Think We've Got A Storybook Romance?" And He Said, "yes, And Every Page Is Ripped.