I Love Black People, But I Hate

Does Having A Wife And Kids Change Your Act? Yes, But Only In The Best Way. It Gives You Weight And Authority. It Also Makes You Closer To The Audience Because The Audience Is Married And Has Kids.

If You See A Black Woman With An Overweight White Man, You Know She Got Effed Up Credit!

You Don’t Need No Gun Control, You Know What You Need? We Need Some Bullet Control. Men, We Need To Control The Bullets, That’s Right. I Think All Bullets Should Cost Five Thousand Dollars… Five Thousand Dollars Per Bullet… You Know Why? Cause If A Bullet Cost Five Thousand Dollars There Would Be No More Innocent Bystanders.

If You Properly Clean A Room, It Gets Dirtier Before It Gets Cleaner.

Karaoke Isn't Fair When You're A Comedian. The Whole Idea Is To Get People Laughing And Enjoying Themselves, And I'm A Professional Funny Guy.