I'm A Great Lover, I'll Bet.

I Find You Can Often Find Humor Just By Turning Something Upside-down. Like A... Small Child.

Cell Phones Are Like A Dog's Nipples... You Don't Have To Shout Into Them!

They Call Me Good Time Emo. Because I Love A Good Time! And My Name Is Emo.

I Asked My Girlfriend, 'will You Marry Me?' She Said, 'we'll Have To Ask My Father.' So We Had A Seance And Jack Ruby Says, 'hello!'

I Was At A Bar Nursing A Beer. My Nipple Was Getting Quite Soggy.